Wiping your Ass In Winter.

I used to dread the moment pressure would, out of the blue, build up in my colon and I was surrounded by snow in minus thirty Celsius. Not only did I have to fumble with my rear suspenders loop straps, I knew my hand was going to get cold, wet, probably somewhat dirty, eventually frozen and water was going to drip down my leg  when I was done. This was the realty of wiping my dutt with just snow or only a little better - snowy moss; I was lucky to find a patch of moss after doing a short search in my environment. Then it occurred to me - why do I have to use snow or just moss (something I’d reach for in the summer)? I started using anything but. The point is to relocate the filth that is lingering around the butt hole after a squat and this can be anything from the creatively use of the surface of an appropriate broken dead standing tree or stick (the symbolism concerns me) to some bunched dead tall grass in a sweeping motion. If I’m lucky I may locate a blow over with dry moss, but some dry moss tends to break apparat and leave things dirtier. 

You don’t rub really hard as you would with TP; just make sure the filth is leaving, repeat, and pull those warm trousers back up.